Weigh-In: 33 + 5

It's December!!!

140 lbs. and 44 days until my due date.  There is no mistaking I'm pregnant now, even in a bulky sweater.  Another mom at daycare said, "I couldn't even tell you were pregnant" when I was in a winter coat, but I think she was just being nice.  The baby's bum is up at the top of my uterus, and it's very much in the way when I bend over.  Tying my shoes is troublesome.  Shaving my legs is very difficult if not impossible, even sitting in a bathtub.

The nursery is completely done and looks adorable.  It's fun, vibrant, to say the least.  It's almost a different room with the new paint.  I changed out a few basic accessories, but otherwise it's the same, just very, very different with Sea Breeze on the wall.  Oliver likes to go and play with "Oliver's car" (his old walker, collapsed into a riding toy) in "baby's room."  The rug even works.  It doesn't match the paint, per se, but it works.  I don't know that we're going to get a decorator's nod of approval for our interior design there, but we like it, which is really all that matters.

This afternoon is my tour of labor and delivery at Vanderbilt.  I'm looking forward to just seeing where all this will be happening.  I had been in Prentice several times before I went there for a tour and to deliver, so it didn't seem as distant a place.  I've really never been in the hospital here.  I even had to get directions from Wes about how to get to the meeting place for today's tour.  (He is working so cannot go with me.)  I do have a list made for a hospital bag, but I'm not going to pack anything ahead of time.  I know that I need things to do while in labor!  I have my next midwife's appointment on Tuesday.  I'm hoping the baby is measuring correctly or at least four weeks further along than where I was at the last appointment.  I need to ask some basic questions at this point, like who to call (if anyone) when I go into labor and am ready to go to the hospital, and at what point in the pregnancy they will let me labor at home rather than try and stop the labor.  I have been having a lot of sharp pains around my cervix.  I think the baby is just really low, but a few evenings I have wondered if things would be happening sooner than later.

We also hired a caregiver for next semester.  Hailey is a graduate of Belmont University and currently in the MDiv program at Vanderbilt but taking a semester off to teach a class at a prison and make some decisions about whether to finish the MDiv program.  She's smart, really nice, sweet with Oliver, excited to be getting a baby to care for, comfortable with part-time and sometimes strange situation (me sometimes at home, Wes sometimes asleep in the bedroom).  Most importantly (and this is my advice to anyone hiring in-home help), we seem to get along well, and I feel comfortable talking to her about what we want to see happen, what we don't want, and so forth.  Sometimes I think it's less important that people agree exactly on what to do with a baby and more important that they feel comfortable talking through things they arise.  It was part of what I loved about Katie in Chicago.  So that's taken care of, and she's set to start in mid-January on my first day of classes.  If the baby has just arrived, I'll just run in for the first hour of class so I can get the syllabus and some face time.  If she's been around for a few weeks, I'll try and go the whole day.

I'm still nervous, even at this point in pregnancy.  I know too much.  I know that getting to 34 weeks doesn't mean there aren't things, very bad things, that could still happen.  Of course, a healthy delivery doesn't preclude those either.  In which case, I should also be nervous about Oliver waking up each morning.  In which case, I should be nervous about Wes, too.  And some days I am -- all of those things.  So usually I just try to take a big breath, know that I have very little control about those things, and so I should just enjoy these last weeks of this pregnancy.

For now, I'm just excited to be able to say when people ask when I'm due, "Next month."

Bye Bye

About a week before we moved, Oliver had to say goodbye to Katie and Jack, our sitter and her son. We met them last fall when I began looking for childcare for Ollie before returning to work. Katie was, without a doubt, the best candidate for the position. She's just a few years younger than me, a new mom, too, and Jack is her walking resume -- he's happy, healthy, and totally adorable. We got double lucky in that Katie was willing to come to our place most days -- Lucy included -- but lived just a few blocks away, in the direction of my work, if I needed to bring Ollie to her so Wes could sleep in the apartment. She never missed a day, never scoffed at our ever-changing scheduling requests, and probably deserves most the credit for getting Ollie onto a regular napping schedule.

As Ollie got older, he and Jack really became good friends. I always used to listen to parents talk about how childcare is "good for" their kids and told myself they were just trying to make themselves feel better. But -- and maybe I'm just trying to make myself feel better -- I do think Ollie benefited from being around Jack. I doubt I would have made an effort to find him other little kids to play with had I been home with him all the time. It just didn't cross my mind that he could really "play" with another kid already. But the two obviously seemed to enjoy one another's company, and it was nice that these two only -- probably eventually oldest -- children had someone to interact with at a young age.

We will very much miss Katie and Jack, especially this fall when Ollie returns to some kind of childcare. I would love to be able to be with my kid all the time and pursue my other goals and interests. Fortunately for me I was able to do those other things without having to worry about Oliver's well-being, knowing he was in such good hands.

Ollie's Journal, Weeks 9-12

Things I did (so much!):
1. Took my first big trip. I was so good on the plane and didn't fuss at all.
2. Had my first babysitter (and my second, the lady who is keeping me when mom and dad are both at work.)
3. Visited with Grandma N. while mom returned to work. She was sad to be away but happy for the adult conversation -- at work and with Grandma. (Evidently my increasing cooing, while adorable, is not enough to sufficiently engage her brain each day.)
4. Went to some work functions for mom and dad. Mom found that holding me during parent-teacher conferences really cut some of the tension out of the equation!
5. Fought the sniffles. If only I knew how to blow my nose already.

Right now:
Sleeping in the stroller after a brief outing with the dog. I don't nap real great, so mom just lets me sleep whenever she can get me down!